Balancing Work, School, and Play

Next semester, I’ll be in 12 credit hours, working a part-time internship, and attempting to enjoy the best (and last) semester with my friends.

I was going to write this post about tips and tricks for balancing your life in a way that you don’t have to sacrifice any of the things you care about, but then I realized that that isn’t possible.

Yes, there are things you can do to cut corners and squeeze as many things into your busy schedule as possible, but then, are you really making time for anything at all? Or are you just half-assing it all, and in doing so not really putting the right amount of time into anything?

This is a hard subject for me because I am a really busy person who wants to think that she can do it all. There are way too many experiences out there that I want to have, and I want so so badly to be there for my friends at all times, but you just can’t do it all.

This is where priorities come in. Priorities are evil. Not really, but sometimes I feel as though they are my enemy. Why can’t I prioritize everything equally? Why can’t I have three separate lives in which I focus on one area of my life in each of them?

I don’t know the solution, or the secret key to unlocking this problem. It is something I’m currently trying to work through. I suppose that’s my answer – it takes time and soul-searching to be able to really look at your life and honestly decide what areas on which you want to focus your precious (and scarce) time. But I have a strong feeling that making a decision will lead to a better outcome. Putting more effort into the things you do and giving up the things you just can’t make time for will show people that when you do something, you do it right, and you do it because you care. I think that that sends a better message than trying to be in one thousand places in once because guess what? You can’t be. And when you aren’t all in, it shows.

As the new year approaches, here’s my challenge for myself, and for you if you wish: pick a few things in your life that you care about and be all in.

You don’t have to give up everything in your life, but try to shave off a few things that you know you don’t have the time or effort to dedicate yourself to fully. Also, make sure you forgive yourself for this. One thing that weighs heavy on me every day is that I don’t play piano as much as I used to. However, beating myself up about it isn’t going to change the fact that I just don’t have the time or desire to make it a priority right now. Forgive yourself and hold onto the idea that maybe one day circumstances will change and you can revisit it.

All that being said, I’m looking forward to the best semester yet with my friends (who I love and appreciate so much) in blue heaven. I can’t wait!

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Leaning into Pain

I was inspired to write this post while I was at the gym, scrunching my nose up as I fought the bike machine for just five more minutes, just two more minutes, 1 MORE MINUTE, PHEW!

As I lumbered away, panting and cursing the machine that I inherently resented but also loved, I thought about something that various yoga instructors have told me in the past.

Acknowledge the pain. Embrace it. Really experience it, and don’t shy away from it – lean into it. 

They would say these things as we each fought our internal battles on our separate mats to stay in one pose for 1 minute, or was it only 30 seconds? Who knew. Sometimes I would think, “This is a load of crap. You’re just telling me this so I’ll hold this position longer, and I’m not fooled!”

But they would still say these things, over and over.

Pain is how you know you’re alive. Pain is human. Be grateful that you can feel this pain. Embrace it, experience it, lean into it. 

Time after time, I would hear their words but still dislike the feeling. However, when I was on the bike at the gym yesterday, it just seemed to make sense to me, and on somewhat of a grander scheme. We are human, and we do have the ability to feel pain, and yoga teachers always told me,

“Remember, we are talking about good pain, the kind that you can bear and that makes you feel good after you’ve pushed through it. Not the kind that means you’re pulling a muscle  – learn the difference.”

So I started thinking about that. Good pain versus bad pain. Good pain motivates us. In exercise, its what tells us that our bodies are working hard and that we will definitely be feeling the effects in the morning. It also tells us that we are using the right set of weights, or doing the right set of movements, to push our bodies to get stronger.

Bad pain tells us to STOP – DON’T DO THAT EVER AGAIN. Bad pain is when we burn ourselves on the stove because we try to clean it too soon after turning the burner off. Bad pain is when we do something we should not, and bad pain is the memory that will prevent us from making the same mistake again.

I know I’m going all philosophical here, but I really think that this lesson on pain is one of the best things my yoga teachers have taught me. It applies everywhere in life. There are times when we must push through the hard stretches in life to get to our end goals. We have to put in a lot of work, but the rewards are worth it and make the temporary discomfort fade into the backs of our minds. There are also times when we must stop because we realize we have pushed ourselves too hard, or in the wrong direction, and we need to give ourselves a break.

Good pain, bad pain. Both are important because they guide us through life. It’s pretty awesome to be a human.

 

“Feel the Real”

I had a really interesting experience while driving on the highway yesterday in Winston-Salem. A billboard, similar to this one, caught my eye. “This Ad is Real” it said, with the url “www.feelthereal.org” on along the side. Of course this caught my attention and I hurriedly went to the url on my phone. My boyfriend was driving – so don’t worry, I was not typing and driving!

The website had a lot to say about OOH – or Out Of Home marketing. I had heard of this before, and I knew that it, along with experiential marketing, was trendy.

The website contains statistics about the amount of ads that are eaten up by bots, and the amount of money that advertisers waste for similar reasons. The website also has a quiz that allows you to determine how “real” you are. I clocked in at a disappointing 45% real. The next page allowed you to read articles on how technology is destroying our relationships with people and our ability to interact in human ways. One of the articles I remember looking at mentioned how people were now taking classes to learn how to ask someone on a date.

While I see the point this website was trying to make, and while I think their execution (in terms of catching my attention) was incredible, I’m not sure that I’m convinced that technology is inherently bad for human interaction. It definitely changes the way we interact with each other, but I’m not sold on the idea that this is a bad thing. Rather, I’m still looking at both sides and in need of much more scientific evidence before I’m a registered pessimist.

Either way, this site is worth a look. It was a cool moment for an ad nerd like me.

Check it out at feelthereal.org.

Prose on Passion and Personal Growth

One of my favorite qualities about myself is that I am passionate about everything that I do. I love learning about new things, old things, scary things, exciting things. There is no limit on my capacity to wonder, and when I find something interesting, I dig in… deep.

Passion is what has gotten me to where I am today, but being passionate is not easy. Passion means caring – deeply – to the point that you are willing to risk fear and rejection in order to pursue something you believe in. I used to think that I was delicate, easily hurt by the slightest comment or change of plans. One misstep along the way would throw me off guard, and I often wondered if I was just a sad-natured person because these instances would happen often.

I realized, however, that my fragility is really strength. When you are so passionate about something, being vulnerable is something you just have to do. Your bones won’t let you shy away from what you truly believe. Being hurt is just what comes with the job description. Allowing myself to experience hurt, anxiety, and fear have only made my passion grow, and opened doors to new experiences. I cherish my ability to care so much and no longer see it as a flaw.

I think it is important to talk positively about ourselves. Introspection is important for personal growth, and that involves acknowledging not only our areas of improvement, but the areas where we shine. The norm is to diminish ourselves to make others feel better, but in reality, this kind of talk just makes everyone feel bad. I want to help change the dialogue. I’m challenging you: think of your favorite quality of yourself and don’t be ashamed – be proud.